National Ridiculous Association

“I call on Congress today to act immediately to appropriate whatever is necessary to put armed officers in every single school in this nation.” --Wayne LaPierre, NRA

GSDS!!

Getting Ready for 2014

Maybe not a "fiscal" cliff, but someone please send her over one by 2014!

Dump Bachmann

GSDS!

Recount

West's foolishness continue as he refuses to concede, attempting to make something out of his loss. The problem is, the more the count continues, the wider his margin of loss. Also, the fact that he won't concede has no bearing on Congressman-elect Murphy's winning. Murphy will be sworn in with the new Congress. West needs to stop this foolishness!

 

Allen West's Recount Backfires

GSDS!

Goodbye!

PLEASE, GSDS!!!!!

DaDaDaDaDaDaDaDa!

"Holy electoral loss, Batman!"

GSDS!

Slug Fest of Desperation

"I have something very, very big concerning the president of the United States," Trump said. "It's very big, bigger than anybody would know." --Donald Trump, Monday, 10/22/12 (turned out to be nothing but a bid for attention)

"President Obama’s shuck and jive shtick with these Benghazi lies must end." --Sarah Palin, posting on Facebook, Wednesday, 10/24/12

(turned out to be more racist coded language to her base)

GSDS!

Note: Image is of two slugs copulating--nuff said!

Take a backseat, Mister!

"If you're going to have women in the workforce you need to be flexible." --Mitt Romney

IF?? And who is the "you" he is referring to?  Sarah Silverman was right--Mitt is one of the most progressive thinkers we have...if we are living in the 1950s! Looks like President Obama told him to...

...GSDS!

How Convenient!

Yes, of course we are entitled to change our minds...

"I grew up reading Ayn Rand and it taught me quite a bit about who I am and what my value systems are and what my beliefs are. It's inspired me so much that it's required reading in my office for all my interns and my staff." --Paul Ryan, 2005  

"I reject her [Ayn Rand's] philosophy. It's an atheist philosophy. It reduces human interactions down to mere contracts and it is antithetical to my worldview. If somebody is going to try to paste a person's view on epistemology to me, then give me Thomas Aquinas. Don't give me Ayn Rand." --Paul Ryan, 2012

GSDS!!!

From the Mouths of "Babes"

"Well, I just think unemployment is really important, so as of now I think it's Mitt Romney." --Lindsay Lohan, on endorsing Mitt Romney

GSDS, both of you!

Stacey Dash: "Clueless," Indeed!

Stacey Dash Endorses Romney

It is quite fitting that Stacey Dash rose to fame starring in "Clueless"--who knew that word would one day be almost synonymous with her name? I guess this unemployed individual thinks that she is NOT a part of the 47% Romney speaks of in the closed rooms he is so fond of!

Stacey Dash, GSDS!

Kerry Washington endorsing President Obama at DNC

And I thought Stacey was sitting at home in a bathrobe, watching "Scandal," eating Cheetos, and plotting Kerry Washington's demise...watch your back, Kerry!

"Monkey Business"--Really??

"Monkey Business"--we know what you mean, Donald Trump. The history of racist commentary and imagery equating blacks with apes of all types is well-known--from the earliest writing of the Republic (Thomas Jefferson's Notes on the State of Virginia chief among them) and continuing today. Trump was speaking in racist code.

GSDS, racist!

More "Legitimate" Foolishness

"It is no big surprise that we fight the terrorists because they are fundamentally un-American, and yet we have terrorists in our own culture called abortionists. One of the good pieces of news why we are winning this war is because there are not enough heartless doctors being graduated from medical schools. There is a real shortage of abortionists. Who wants to be at the very bottom of the food chain of medical profession? And what sort of places do these bottom-of-the-food-chain doctors work in? Places that are really a pit. You find that along with the culture of death go all kinds of other law-breaking: not following good sanitary procedure, giving abortions to women who are not actually pregnant, cheating on taxes, all these kinds of things, misuse of anesthetics so that people die or almost die."--Todd Akin, 2008 (as reported in Huffington Post--click here)

"Giving abortions to women who are not actually pregnant"--HUH?? Didn't we tell Todd Akin to go sit down somewhere???

 GSDS, damn it!!!

Roger Goodell and the Replacement Refs

It's getting ugly out there! Football Commissioner Roger Goodell is presiding over absolute mayhem!

GSDS!

In Media Res

On Good Morning America, Friday, September 14, 2012:

George Stephanopoulos: "Is $100,000 middle income?"

Mitt Romney: "No, middle income is $200,000 to $250,000 and less." 

GSGS! 

 

Say "Yes!" to the Dress

According to the Washington Post in an article here, Romney surrogate John Sununu has issues with one of the dresses First Lady Michelle Obama wore at the Democratic National Convention last week--the dress, designed by Tracy Reese retails for under $500--the First Lady said she paid about $350 for it: 

"[Sununu] alleged on a conference call to reporters on Wednesday that the Obama camp was telling a host of lies including the dress’s price. 'Somehow I don’t think that’s the truth either,' he said, regarding the dress."

One must wonder what the point of the comment is, and also why First lady wannabe Anne Romney's dress purchase (an Oscar de la Renta, purportedly costing over $2,000) wasn't on his radar.

GSDS!

 

Freudian Slip

"But our leaders of today have decided it's more important to be popular, to say and do what's easy, and say yes rather than to say no, when no is what is required." --Chris Christie

The guy on the left MUST be talking about the guy on the right, RIGHT? 

GSDS!

Marathon Man

I do not mind lying, but I hate inaccuracy. --Samuel Butler

"Paul Ryan's campaign walked back comments the VP nominee made about running a marathon. 'I had a two hour and fifty-something' marathon, Ryan said last week in an interview. 'I hurt a disc in my back, so I don’t run marathons anymore.' But the Ryan campaigned confirmed to Runner's World that he has only run one marathon, the 1990 Grandma’s Marathon in Duluth, Minnesota, which he finished in just over 4 hours." --Alana Horowitz, Huffington Post, September 1, 2012

GSDS!

Meanwhile, in the Bizarro World...

 

Nothing to add...just...

GSDS!

Restoration 101

"The DIY project took place a couple of weeks ago at the the church of Santuario de Misericordia in Borja, Spain, when an elderly woman reportedly took it upon herself to repair a fresco by 19th century Spanish artist Elias Garcia Martinez." --Huffington Post, 8/22/12

Apparently, it's not the first time Senora Gimenez got hold of a paint brush!

"Restorer" Cecilia Gimenez, you need to...

...GSDS!

The Definition of Insanity

"A new law was signed by [Republican] Arizona Governor Jan Brewer on Thursday that has abortion advocates up in arms. The new law, titled "Women’s Health and Safety Act," deems a woman pregnant 2 weeks before conception." --Kelly Cozzone, Examiner.com (August 25, 2012)

''And then let's talk about those Lady Parts."

 Stand up, and then...

...GSDS!

Meanwhile, in Michigan...

From Politico, April 12, 2011: "I think the citizenship test has been passed. I believe the president was born in the United States. There are real reasons to get this guy out of office," Romney told CNBC's Larry Kudlow the day after he formally announced that he’s exploring a run for the White House. "The man needs to be taken out of office but his citizenship isn't the reason why."

"No one's ever asked to see my birth certificate. They know that this is the place that we were born and raised." --Mitt Romney, August 24, 2012

Resurrecting the birther nonsense. I guess desperate times call for desperate measures!

GSDS!

Revenge of the Lady Parts

Storm delays start of Republican National Convention

That's why it's called "Mother" Nature!

Akin, Ryan, and all the other fools...

GSDS!!

Fixing Stupid

Rep. Todd Akin (R-Missouri) on his stance on abortion and pregnancies from the act of rape: 

"It seems to me, first of all, from what I understand from doctors, that’s really rare. If it’s a legitimate rape [my bold italics], the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down. But let’s assume that maybe that didn’t work or something. You know, I think there should be some punishment, but the punishment ought to be on the rapist and not attacking the child."  

According to the Centers for Disease Control, more than 32,000 pregnancies result from rape each year--so much for "rare."Although he later issued the standard "I misspoke" quote to try to walk back his stunningly ignorant, outrageous, and inaccurate remarks, it's clear that Todd Akin's original quote reflects his views on women, abortion, and rape. The "war on women" by the GOP is real.

This clown really needs to GSDS!

  

Two Sides of a Coin

Is it possible...that Fred Mertz had a long-lost brother??

 

The question is, though, should they go sit down somewhere, or should HE???

"Leaks"

Huh?? Something must be leaking out of this guy's head!

 

GSDS!

 

"The World Needs a Hero"

“Back in my country, my president [referring to President Obama] is trying to pass a gun ban so he's staging all of these murders. The 'Fast and Furious' thing down at the border…and Aurora, Colorado, all the people that were killed there. And now, the beautiful people at the Sikh temple. I don't know where I'm going to live if America keeps going the way it's going because it looks like it's turning into Nazi America.” –Dave Mustaine, singer with heavy metal group Megadeth (formerly with Metallica)

GSDS! 

We Don't Need Your "Kind" Around Here!

"Maybe you should go sit down. We can all see what your kind has done for the City of Plainfield!"

--Blog comment submitted by "Anonymous," August 14, 2012)

 Hmmm...my "kind"...still trying to define that one...a black kind...a woman kind...an LGBT kind...a progressive Democrat kind...an English professor kind...a blogger kind...a Plainfield-loving councilwoman kind...a cookie baker kind...an African American literature kind...a vintage Telechron clock-lover kind...a New York Jets-lover kind?  

I figure it must be the Jets, because my love for my team causes many people to tell me to...

...GSDS!

WWJD

"If you have a priest that is pushing social justice, go find another parish. Go alert your bishop."

--Glenn Beck, 2010

GSDS!!

The Pundit

"This year is a good opportunity for other voices to speak at the convention and I'm excited to hear them. Everything I said at the 2008 convention about then-candidate [Barack] Obama still stands today, and in fact the predictions made about the very unqualified and inexperienced community organizer's plans to 'fundamentally transform' our country are unfortunately coming true."  

--Sarah Palin, on why she will not be speaking at the Republican Convention this year.

 

GSDS!

 

Get Me a Glass of Haterade!

Arrest that man...fashion violation...!

GSDS!

The Virtue of Selfishness

"I don't consult polls to tell me what my principles are or what our policies should be."

--Paul Ryan

Yes, Paul, we know who you consult.

Romney/Ryan (Rand)...GSDS!

 

Prisoner Re-Entry

“It takes all the fun out of a bracelet if you have to buy it yourself.” --Peggy Joyce

I guess Lindsay Lohan concurs!

GSDS!

"Let Me Clarify That..."

"I'm not familiar precisely with what I said, but I'll stand by what I said, whatever it was."  —Mitt Romney, quoted May 17, 2012

 

"STAND" by what he said?? He needs to...

GSDS!!!

The Fast and the Furious

 

GSDS!

"He's Mine, All Mine!"

“Good morning Anita Hill, it’s Ginni Thomas. I just wanted to reach across the airwaves and the years and ask you to consider something. I would love you to consider an apology sometime and some full explanation of why you did what you did with my husband [Associate Justice Clarence Thomas]. So give it some thought. And certainly pray about this and hope that one day you will help us understand why you did what you did. O.K., have a good day.”--Virginia Thomas (in a 2010 voice mail message to Prof. Anita Hill)

So, nearly 20 years later, Virginia Thomas called Anita Hill out of the blue to ask Hill to apologize for testifying in 1991 that Clarence Thomas, up for confirmation by the Senate Judiciary Committee (and formerly Hill's superior at the EEOC) had sexually harassed her while she worked for him--making sexual comments and offering graphic details of his favorite pornographic movies. Virginia Thomas clearly had some bizarre ulterior motive for making a call to Hill, who promptly contacted the police at Brandeis University (where she teaches) to have them investigate this creepy communication. Click here for the link to the New York Times story.

Rather than letting it go, Virginia Thomas felt the need to dredge it all up again. Perhaps she was angry about Anita Hill goin' in on her fear that Hill had some sexual interest in Clarence Thomas, whose love for graphic pornography was (or maybe still is?) legendary.

From Hill's 1998 memoir: "...one can imagine that she is guided by her own romantic interest in her husband when she assumes that other women find him attractive as well." Hahahahaha! 

Virginia Thomas...

GSDS!

Unfunny and Thus Far...Meaningless

I don't want to be 60 years old standing on stage telling some jokes. I want my life to mean something.--Steve Harvey

The feeling is mutual, Steve.

It actually may be too late for you, Steve. Your sexist, homophobic rants continue to reveal you as an unfunny jackass--the depth of your narrow-minded bigotry is merely hinted at in this compilation video (below) of your "wit and wisdom." Why anyone would take relationship advice from you, or watch your lame, lowbrow, dimwitted comedies--well, there's no accounting for taste.

 
 

 

GSDS!

"She Still Has a Chance for the Gold..."

Tim Daggett and Al Trautwig, NBC commentators for the women's gymnastics at the 2012 Olympics, continue to pollute the airwaves with their biased, sexist, graceless, and moronic coverage, which they persist in lacing with fake drama.... 

These two got their comeuppance and were beside themselves with shock and disappointment that the vault competition didn't go the way it should have, in their minds.

Photo credit: Deadspin

Lame commentators, GSDS!

At Least I Didn't Kill Anybody

Few remember that Phil Spector, eccentric music producer and convicted killer, was also arrested on misdemeanor "bad hair day" charges, to which he pleaded guilty. Rebecca Williams refuses to acknowledge the effect the 1990s had on her, pleading not guilty but being convicted anyway.

 GSDS...both of you!

How to Make Money From Mass Murder

This is an excerpt from an actual (yes, ACTUAL!) press release for the online dating site WhatsYourPrice.com:

"Hi [redacted],

In the event of a tragedy like the Dark Knight Massacre, who would you want by your side on a first date? One online dating website asked their members what they would do on a first date if they found themselves in danger, and the answer may surprise you. If you are holding out for a hero, dating someone who is generous, but not necessarily wealthy, may be the difference between life and death.

During the Dark Knight Massacre, three men lost their lives to save the lives of their girlfriends. But what if you were on a first date, and you had only just met? How do you differentiate the courageous from the cowardly? According to the results of the survey of over 20,000 generous male members, it’s by generosity, but a man’s generosity is not defined by the size of his wallet. In fact, men who make between $80,000 to $150,000 per year are more likely to take a bullet for you on a first date.Those who fall outside of that income bracket, are significantly less likely to put their well being over that of their date’s, on a first date."

WhatsYourPrice.com is the first online dating website where generous members can bid on a first date with an attractive member. The website launched in April 2011 and currently has over 400,000 members worldwide. “Our website is known for generous men bidding for the chance to spoil and pamper women on a first date,” says Founder & CEO, [redacted]. “Not only are they generous, but most of the men who use our website are also gentlemen. A gentleman opens doors, pulls out chairs, and puts their well being above that of their date, even in the line of fire.”

I have attached the press release for your review, and the full study is available by request. To schedule an interview with Founder & CEO, [redacted], please send an email to [redacted] or call [redacted].

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Best,
[redacted]

I wonder how much he "paid" for her.

The owner of the WhatsYourPrice.com site, Brandon Wade, is also the "author" of this ickily-titled tome: 

GSDS! 

Blasphemy

On Wednesday, August 1, 2012, the Affordable Care Act requirement for insurers to provide birth control coverage for women without charging an additional co-pay went into effect. The italics for the ridiculous and offensive comparisons made by Congressman Kelly are mine.

"I know in your mind, you can think of the times America was attacked," he said at a press conference on Capitol Hill. "One is Dec. 7, that's Pearl Harbor Day. The other is Sept. 11, and that's the day the terrorists attacked. I want you to remember Aug. 1, 2012, the attack on our religious freedom. That is a day that will live in infamy, along with those other dates." –Rep. Mike Kelly, (R-PA)

GSDS!